Every day is an invitation to receive

I was standing there waiting for my fat juicy burger and I just couldn’t stop thinking about how much life I still have in me. I got my phone out and texted my brother “I wanna date again”. One thing I don’t like about being this far from home is the time difference which makes discussions like this hardly flow. I knew my brother was gonna encourage me to go for it, we talked about it often and not that I ever needed someone’s approval to do what I want but it did help to hear that it is ok to want to be with someone, at least when I was ready for it. Something about hearing my voice out of my head makes me look at things more objectively, it makes a difference “progress not perfection” I wanna be out there and that is progress. There is still so much for me to figure out, and that’s a process..

There’s no way for me to know if I am ready, but here we go…

So how am I supposed to do this? can I be honest about the fact that I am… well, a “widow” am I supposed to voluntarily mention that my husband died, to a stranger, on a first date? Would that scare them away? Is he supposed to ask about it? When to say what? And why isn’t there a handbook for life!

One step at a time Ohoud!

You go place one step at a time…

Since I was far away from everything I knew, I decided to go digital. A quick search for widows dating platforms was enough to make me feel like a blue lonely unicorn in a cold dark cave in a mountain on an uninhabitable island in the middle of the night, and it was storming! Where are the young good men with that extra baggage of a loss!

Not knowing what to expect

No idea what the rules are

One thing I know, every day is an invitation to receive, and it is kind of up to me to decide what to receive, right!